“And the trouble is, if you don’t risk anything, you risk even more.”
― Erica Jong
Do you know what it is you want? Are you fighting for what you want? Are you worthy of the gifts you seek? Do you act in the way that you do to get a pat on the back, or do you express yourself in the same way a musician pours their heart into playing a piece of music? I’ll stop with the questions for now, this isn’t an interview after all, but most of these questions are ones I ask myself frequently, and the answer “No” still comes up frequently.
The warrior is not a man or a woman, it’s not are not a young entrepreneur CEO billionaire or a stay at home parent with two kids and a partner to take care of. It’s a mindset that defines how you approach your life. It’s not defined by your gender, income, or life goals. It has everything to do with your approach to life.
Thankfully, you don’t need to be able to answer any of the questions from the start to be a warrior, it’s enough to be seeking the answers, and doing it with commitment. That is, by slowly pushing timidity to the wayside. Timidity is the greatest evil that I’ve become aware of over the past few years. The hopes and dreams of so many crushed because they didn’t believe in themselves or were afraid of the judgement of others.
“I really want to travel to this seemingly beautiful country, but my mom says I need to be responsible and save up for a house.”
“I’m starting to feel empty at my corporate job but I’m afraid how my friends will see me if I quit, they always say I’m so lucky and have it so good”
“I may not like anything about my current relationship, but my parents and friends say we’re so good together, so I may as well continue it for another five years”.
All is not lost, far from it. The mindset of the warrior is one you can start developing right now. Find the timidity in your daily life, and start to root it out. The warrior knows what they want, they fight for it, and they act purely out of their need to express their inner desires and provide their gifts to the world. A gift is not given with the expectation of praise or someone telling you what a great job you did. Next time you stopped yourself from doing something you really wanted to do, search for the source inside yourself. If you meditate, this is a good time to dig deeper too.
Hot Tip: One easy shift to determine the real impact of your current battle, consider yourself ten years from now, or even five years from now, maybe even one year from now. How will the you who chose to commit to your decision be after that much time has passed? If you disappointed your friends or parents with the choice you made, how much will they still care one year from now? If the answer is “a lot” or “I don’t think they would ever drop it”, you’re either completely wrong, or you need to choose between the risk of going for it anyways, or the risk of growing resentful and bitter because you chose to live your life by other people’s standards.
It may be that you’re afraid to disappoint your friends, your family, that you’re afraid to be judged by society, yet your inspiration to that choices must come from somewhere. The multi-talent Grace Hopper says “It’s easier to ask for forgiveness then it is for permission”. These words embody the warrior mindset in a way better then I could ever hope to say it. Act anyways, if you need to ask for forgiveness after, do so, but never regret you took action in a way that you were inspired to do. You don’t need to justify yourself to anyone, as no one has has spent even one moment living your life.